You dont even know

Im not the typical shorty
Many dudes, yeah I be fooling
All in my ish cuz of my unnatural seclusion
Wondering what Im doing
Who i'm screwing
or just eluding
Never been in love, found out shit is just for fools and

I feel like the whole world is on my shoulders
Never no trick, dont do favors cuz im no douja
Your like paper I can fold ya
When I walk by dudes just wide eye, like they was awaken by the foldgers

Stress getting me
Depression aint the only thing that be eating me
So do you honey
Cuz im a def do me

You c me do me
Im a be me, scuze me
Do me dirty, okay boo you gonna c
Cuz I do
If I was your wife than i stand by you
Hard times too
Cuz cant nobody see you just as I do
Yall never find a love like this, you wasted to much time boo
You took something i cant get back you wasted too much time boo

It was mutual if i beat alot know what I do to you,
To prove to you, to groove with you,
cant get enough of soothing you
Say im playing a game but why would i fool with you????

Compassion needed
More and more now i feel depleted
Love is love boo
But your not the only one that need it
To breathe it
Knew you was my heart cuz you eat it it

Took my innocence matter fact you know what nooka keep it

Stop clocking me
Cuz in your dreams i know you still watching me
Thought you was bout it babe so why you still jocking me

No apologies or copping pleas
No more licking, please get off your knees
Knew it take a man to understand my street philosophies

Hesitation, action came before I contemplated
What you took for me cant be priced for compensation
Learned the lesson
Dont trust no one, keep em guessing
No matter who it is go no further than caressing

Thats why they wetting
Cuz im too real for them to C
Maybe one day, I'll find a man as real as me...........

You got a long way home

You got a long way home

your fancy footwork cant take you there

You got a long way home

your fancy footwork will never get you there

You took me higher than I could ever fly

Twisted works, clouded my sky

Invested much  and lost it all

Your tender words

don't mean shit at all

A common thief, stole my heart

I guess I'm now a broken part

Imperfect beauty set the pace

You may be leading but i win this race

Tears leave stains on promises

Next time I'll use my common sense

Hurt me hard with softer claims

Time to pick up and start again

You got a long way home

your fancy footwork cant take you there

You got a long way home

your fancy footwork will never get you there

Clouded haze, my j is near

Reiterating no need for here

elaborate tunnels peripheral sound bites

I'm missing home......

M missing home

The distance grows when you talk

I'm not stupid you silly punk

I got the keys and the drive is all right

Hope your feet ain't cold

Your walking home.....

Dancing around the issues here

You cant hide behind your beer

Self medication gives you no fear

But your far from home

long way goes

You got a long way home

your fancy footwork cant take you there

You got a long way home

your fancy footwork will never get you there

All we can do is wait it out
and the truth will come out
Dont believe his tainted words........
truth is the only form of hurt

I stuck by and kept you near
Im a fool, cuz you left me here
 Tried and tried and made excuse
your talk is dryer than the vermouth

Priveluge to even get entwined
Stupid me for wasting time
Hold is broke so no more games
Heard enough its all the same

All I can do is wait it out.............
A big girl now
I cast my doubts
Dont believe I felt for you
You just lost a treasure boo

Hiding blind
no need to delve
welcome to your form of hell
Hit the bricks cuz they dont sing
Your empty promises and bells dont ring

I put you hear so you could win
You will never touch this soul again
All you can do is beg and plead and hope i give you mercy please

All you can do is wait it out
and the truth will come out
dont believe your tainted words......
my truth is your only form of hurt

I get high and you get drunk

I get high and you get drunk/

together we put on the funk/

We  break it down and party all night/

Cuz its been a while...it been a while/

Sweet temptation of the mind/

contemplating its been some time/

You laid it downed and now im alright
But its been a while, its been a while

shaky pages let you know I'm there/

all bundled up but still want your care/

Denying truth leaves me alright
But im lying now, im lying now

Haziness, makes my body float

weed and pills, meth, g drink and coke

The big eyed feeling led me all night

It's been a while...its been a while

Standing with you but feel im not here

The since of lose, I have no fear

This is something you need to hear

Its been a while

Its been a while

I get high and you get drunk

Wisp of smoke, the smells too much

Chocolate flowing but sours dutch
Its been awhile, its been awhile

AK rise I lean to side
Swaying off the hurt inside
 Lifted senses or lack of touch

Cuz its been a while

Its been a while

I get high and you get drunk/

together we put on the funk/

We  break it down and party all night/

Cuz its been a while...it been a while/

Stabilizing, I don't need much

Cuz it makes me forget about you.......
Its makes mr forget about that
It makes me forget what was wacked

Its been a while or has it chile?

Hooka fruit and molly called

Feeling light, no need at all

Lost in crowds, cant take it now

Cuz its been a while

Its been a while

Funk pulsating, i need you near

Once I'm high, forget your there

Works out good and I party all night

Cuz its been a while....

It's been a Whileeeeeeeeeeee

Popping, sniffing, gulping those things

Swallow, toking we need these things

Glassy eyes thru veils of smoke

Choke on more than rope a dope

We getting high partying all night

Cuz Its been a while

I'm lying chile

I get high and you get drunk/

together we put on the funk/

We  break it down and party all night/

Cuz its been a while...it been a while/

Hate

It flows through my veins

Embedded in my head and there is no way to get it out

The challenge is never a challenge, until it becomes a challenge

I seeth with the demean you show my society

I gleam with the sweat of blood and tears

I hate that you don't see what needs to be done

for the world to be one

or at least function as such

I hate that you throw out misdirection

to leave me unprotected

thinking I was in the wrong

I hate that I still struggle,

Though I'm a Master of three

A counselor for free

And give up all for your conversation

I hate that I still need to search

I lack the birth

To give me cause to carry on

I hate that I feel behind

While everyone thinks I already bend that curve

The cliff exist

for me to fall off from

Ignore more from

And think that I'm okay

I hate that everyday news is carried away to satisfy the network sponsors

I hate that you don't see, cuz you choose to be

Blind

I hate that I still love you so much

I hate that we can't be friends

I hate that this happened again

I hate that, I have hate in my heart

Its time to depart and just tell you my dislikes

My resign

Headlights in the rearview

They coming fast

I hate careless drivers

Prizes.........

I ran to see if the prize was won

The hook never grasped the fluff of the bear

I'm the preacher of this sermon

I rebuke the unworthy vermin

Only to fall trap to the devils needs

I need for things

Illustrations help, cuz im visual

Your worthlessness leaves residuals

How do I get rid of it

Be rid of it

Give back to the innocent

Bend to it

Pause

What makes you feel dirty?

Brick wall stabilized

Fantisized between these thighs

Sarah Jones revolution will be televised

Mine has to be qualified

To feel that i am worthy

I write with my heart and see with my eyes

I write with my left but lose with my right

The ampedextrious have no need here

To be here...this belongs to a one armed bandit 

We only C here

Performance is not just a show

I see it everyday

Questioning the laws that protect us all

I do shit for people

Sometimes its illegal

But fuck it the world still turns

Doesn't it???

And i wake up alone........

Bright lights hide the shadow following in my wake

The sun breaks as the clouds run for cover

Filled in days to treat the blaze that the firefighter couldn't conquer

Bar hopping, show stopping good times

Plays and shows, bros and hoes

Lounges that make you skate your honor

Jumping out of planes, wings and thangs

Shots of H2O and absinthe

Ride that bull

Aphrodisiacs don't tell me what I want

But they give me what I need

Bleary eyed, shadow lined eyes reading deep into a sponsor

In life I trust

Queen bed to crush, all the forbidden answers

Playing blackjack chased with pickle backs

The fogginess don't lead to answers

Duck, duck, goose...your it

Then your not

And I wake up alone.........

Running away

The footsteps are resounding.....as they taper off

The trip down the stairs was intensified by the metal door.....

Disoriented I stagger to a stand.....

The warmth of the blood drips down my face

The saltiness of it....increases the anger

This is no stranger, but someone that should be trusted

Running into the yard I backtrack

Open the basement door hatch and crumble to the floor

2 minutes

I run up to the room that was mines for so long grabbing items that I can't really distinguish

Hoping I am as silent as I have been for so long

My heart rate won't slow and the adrenaline still has me feeling no pain

Back at the hatch 

Into the night......

Running.......................................

Breath labored, chest hurts

I continue to run

Not all who wander.........

The deafining display of life plays out

My actions have always spoken louder than words

Here my words will speak louder than actions

Causing chain reactions

Cause is still unknown

So I walk

Til feet are blistered, in search of a new adventure 

to challenege the one that's gone

Hopstopping up the avenues

Getting a kinder view of what has been lost for so long

Life happens throughout everything

Its the way of things

Perception is the cause

Walking the earth

Feeling mother natures birth and appreciating what it formed

This maze eludes me

Tries to fool me

Blocking me in, so I can't move on

Yet I have never stopped moving

The momentum of the desert sand 

Make's me cry for a mirage

Where am I?

Watching the ocean swallow the horizon

Who knows the timing?

 Or when we will be gone?

Pressure rains........

We come in alone and that is the way we go out

Never sure of the route or where it will leave us

That's why I talk through Jesus, cuz he's been present all along

NOT ALL WHO WANDER ARE LOST                                                                                                 

Imperfect Beauty

It lays at my shoulder so that a glance helps me to remember

Broken soul, painstakingly pieced back together

No matter how new it looks inside it is always broken

Tested through experience and vicarious assaults

Broken down to lose the heart fought for

The effortlessness is not so, it takes practice

Acting is not only a career, it's a need for people like me

Chaos reins within my heart, body and soul

Who I am on the outside is constantly judged 

Who I am on the inside is only known by me

The pieces of the jigsaw puzzle all come from different boxes

leaving the picture to never be solved

We are our own worse enemy only after the real one has left us to pick up the pieces of the life they ripped away

Bites to our hands to get the grip from us

Missing coins land on the engagement that was also lost

So we sleep on trains for your benefit of the doubt

Breaking bad while my face hit the concrete

I try to forget

Telling lies to keep my life......not realizing how destroyed it already has become

Step in my shoes and you might never wake up......

Ever break up

Ever come to the realization that your life is fucked up

Life goes on.......

Cherry Blossoms float off the branches with grace, to lay at rest

Beautiful in their fall......

Once they hit the ground the deterioration starts

 I do what I do, I say what I say, I make mistakes, I suffer from self esteem issues, I suffer from the neglect of nurturing love, I suffer through my pain, I suffer....but all you can see is beauty

All I see is Imperfection

Childhood games

I'm trapped inside us, trying to remember me

Someone said freeze

The whirlwind of love left jaded pictures 

How do I seperate it?

Hiding and seeking

All I see is you, where did I get lost?

The valley tells me that it has been discovered before

Entrapping the soul of the ones that were unsure

Leafing through memories leads to flashes of brilliance

The blinding light cause lightening strikes within my heart

The gathering of goods tells me this is over

Marco..............

Where are you?

The Polo is gone

Is the game over?

Manhunting these empty alleys of the heart in order to find love hidden under a car

Tag your it

Mother may I......grow strong in order to start anew?

The light is RED so I stay still, waiting for the go

I been ducking your goose 

in a silent game of musical chairs

Childhood games still plaging the grown

I don't want to grow up, I'm still a............

 

We were young  and now we are not........

So sit your ass down and take these cards, let me figure out when your bluffing

It's time to play the hand you were dealt