I have died many times and arisen like the Phoenix

The stabbing pain leading to stars in the eyes
I have died many times and arisen like the Phoenix
Hands clenching the Kleenex
Trying to slow it down

The stretch of muscles holding on for dear life
As they become inflexible and air tight
Slithering tears escaping my eyes
I have died many times and arisen like the Phoenix

Self care or well fare seems to not exist
Screams escaping my lips through anguished cries
All I can do is die, because no matter what I do.....I die

But I rise like the Phoenix because I am not done yet
At 31 a true vet to the games played and displayed underneath it all
For within a battle rages and I fill/feel these pages with the truth placed before me

I have died but I rise
The anger has not discovered what was uncovered within the vestibule of my experience
This shit is serious

Want to stay, spent on the floor or the couch of my house crying, smoldering smoke
its the only thing that takes my mind off the pain
When it rains it pours and I die

But I rise because of who I am
I fight because to lose is not an option

I rise so that people understand
Even though I have the body that fails me
My soul is to be spread to the masses
So they can gain traction
And let go of the little things
leading them to bigger things and bigger dreams
That would of before lay unconquered

I die but each time I do.....allows for more of you to rise.......


So I die.....and I trip
and I falter
and crash
and I'm brash
and angry
because maybe I have a right to be
Each time I die it tries to take that light from me

Shadowing me in a darkness so alone
I shy from truths
I shun society
I leave everyone out

Misery needs no company and I need not your pity

So I die......alone

But I rise like the Phoenix for all who need
I rise to show a different breed 
For all to see the little things should never be glanced over

I'm a soldier

So I rise like the Phoenix 

Hoping each time that the power of my light still exist when I rise......

To bring truths to others eyes

So I die........knowing......

The pain will stop eventually
I will recover eventually
I will grow to respect it eventually

I rise.......